Sitting in the master bath with her mother to have her hair combed out after showering, Olivia was full of questions. Daddy had just returned from Tae Kwon Do class and was changing out of his gear in the same area.
“Mommy, why did you marry daddy?” she asked.
“I love daddy.”
“I know, but why did you marry a boy?”
Daddy looks up, slightly startled expression on his face.
“Why did I marry a boy?” asks a surprised mother
“Yea, they’re so smelly”
Daddy looks up again, obviously offended
“Daddy”, she says loudly, “Why didn’t you marry a dude?”
Daddy looks so startled that a little spittle forms at the corner of his mouth. He is unable to say a word.
“Olivia, why would daddy do that?” asks mother.
“Well, if he married a boy at least they could pee the same way!”
When Olivia broke her arm, grandpa Joe sent a teddy bear to her with a cast on the same arm. Yesterday, Olivia asked her mother.
“Mom, my arm is all better so teddy’s arm must be too, so can we take the cast off teddy’s arm?”
Mother said, “Of course, bring him downstairs.”
Time passes.
Mother, now upstairs, sees Olivia and asks, “Do you want me to take the cast off teddy’s arm?”
“No thanks. I think I’ll keep him just the way he is until I break something else.”
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Be kind. I'm so old a snide comment might be the end of me!