Raising New Hampshire

My wife Martha and I had our daughter, Jessica, when we were quite young. I was 22, she was 21. That was 39 years ago. We were the one and only couple in our social group at that time, 1970, with a baby. At least one guy we knew from college was so horrified at the thought of bringing a child into this wicked, wicked world that it ended our acquaintanceship.

Other folks were more circumspect and simply shook their heads in wonderment at some people's foolishness. What about careers, income, success, getting up in the world, people asked. And Jessica was a challenge. She was beautiful, smart and stubborn, like her mother. I have often said Jessica was preparing for her career as a lawyer long before she went to law school!

Her birth was also relatively easy. We both assumed we would have another baby whenever we felt ready. And, eventually, we tried. Three miserable miscarriages later, we resigned ourselves to one wonderful child and I had a vasectomy so Martha wouldn’t have to continue with birth control pills.

As we neared forty, and Jessica graduated from high school, everyone else we knew was about to have their first child or desperately trying. Suddenly, the world appeared less wicked, overpopulation fell into the background and babies were everywhere. And we were empty nesters before the term had even been invented.

We could run around the house naked as jailbirds, whatever those naked birds are, as much as we liked! Everyone else we knew was debating breast versus bottle feeding.

I’m not recommending everyone get married young or have kids while they are still kids. But, while sometimes very rocky, it worked best for us in the long run.

Jessica now has three daughters, ages 10, 7 and 4. I do not envy her raising these children in this day and age. Has the world or this part of it changed so much in 40 years? Or have I just gotten older and more risk adverse?